On Commitment

((Taken from a secret blog of mine... I have only a few entries..and it is not public..but I felt like this post was something I wanted to share afterall. Perhaps I will share others too..it is helpful to look back on thoughts and ideas..feelings of mine..and see where I have traveled in my journey.. enjoy!!))

September 1, 2013

We are just reaching our 1 year mark since we started our Son~Rise programs with the boys.
It has been an amazing year filled with so much learning about my own heart. Learning about parts of my heart that I thought I had already done a good job at knowing about myself. I can remember coming back from my Start~Up program at the Autism Treatment Center of America and saying to my husband, partially out of excitement and gusto from the intense process I had just learned.. and partially out of..let's just get it all out in the open.. CONTROL... what was I saying??  I said.. "You ((everyone)) either needs to jump on board or get off of the tracks!" Now, surely this was not what they had just taught me to say to my beloved husband.. but it was a surge of focus that I needed to make clear to him and everyone else directly involved with our children.

Focus..Commitment..

What I have realized about myself is that I AM so committed .

Wow.

Commitment isn't always accompanied with immediate results.. ones that we can see clearly at the moment.. The results have been revealed to me as the year has gone on..

Watching endless hours of videos about the Son~Rise approach.
Spending countless hours talking to team members about their time in the play room with the children.
Waiting.
Progress coming to a screeching halt after a windfall of milestones being made.
Being the only one left playing after we lost our entire team due to their choice to leave.
Still choosing to believe in this fullest potential thing we get from fully loving!!

Commitment.

This summer, Sam has really taken to licking all sorts of things.. yes, licking.
This is his ism. ((his thing that gives him focus/comfort/surges of intense effort))
During our sessions in his play room, he would transfer his saliva to objects and observe how the colors and vibrancy would be magnified.
His mouth juices would be constantly at the ready to continue this intense focus with another object..
Incredible!
I began to realize how fully committed he was ((is)) to his licking.

It took me awhile to LOVE this ism..and it was really so much more than the ism that I fell in love with.

I saw it as such an amazing quality to embrace.
I saw it not just as licking objects.
I began to see how he could stay with his idea.. and be completely committed to it!

I wanted some more of that.

And from then on, after so much licking.. I started to see myself become more
intensely focused than ever.
Arriving to his playroom with commitment on my mind.

What a gift!

I am so incredibly grateful for this summer's lesson that my beautiful boy taught me.

Joyfully His.

((And  a little song for you  .. May we all be taken deeper..to our own great unknown..may we know an unexplainable peace as the ocean's rise.. for me it is My Beloved Jesus. I am being taken deeper than my feet have ever wandered.. my trust is COMPLETELY without borders..and I continue daily to be in the midst of His Presence. ))

Much love.
Joyfully..me